Transcript: Burger King Kids Club

Rob Long on the very worst way to come up with a TV show

This is Rob Long with Martini Shot for the Ankler.

Years ago, the Burger King corporation tried to connect with the kids, which is how I'm sure they put it during the marketing meeting. “What are we doing to connect with the kids?” asked a senior vice president.

“Glad you asked. We have a meeting scheduled to tackle that,” answered an executive vice president.

So a meeting was convened and consultants were hired and they created something they called the Burger King Kids Club which they stocked with a fictionalized group of animated kids and then ran commercials about their exploits. It was like a mini-show starring a fun group of cartoon friends that took place in and around a Burger King franchise.

Do you remember this? I know I didn’t dream it. This really happened.

The kids in the real Burger King Kids Club — and I promise I am not making this up — were exactly what you'd expect from someone making a parody of the Burger King Kids Club.